I know it is not easy for me and my family members to face the fact we have to go visiting my late husband CK 's grave. It's only been one year that he has left us and just seemed like yesterday. Its so strange. Yesterday, I came back from my groceries and saw a beautiful butterfly resting and feeding on nectar from flowers in the garden . I have not seen such a beautiful butterfly in my garden since a while ago. So I just sit quietly and watched it from far. The Chinese believed that the butterfly could be CK coming back to see us.
I did not had a good sleep for almost a week due to my flu. The virus is so strong and still weakening my whole body system . But whatever it is I still have to pull myself into one and do whatever that I need to do. Tell my mind to " Just do what you need to do- Go to ck 's Grave". Otherwise no one can do it except you. Lucky thing is that I am still in one piece.
I quickly wake up early in the am and go to the market to pick up some fresh and beautiful flower to bring to CK 's grave so that he can smell the freshness of his favorite Koke Fa ( Chrysanthemum) . After picking up the breakfast, I quickly rush home to wake Ivan and Jacy up. Took the flowers and water and put it into the car. My phone rang and my sisters Lye yong told me that they are already on the way to Klang. Still I did not hear from Michael. Peep from my main door and saw Michael waited outside. Jacy rushed down while we waited for her in the car.
Told Jacy to take the Glenmarie way and the journey went on smooth sailing. My brother Chee Kwan arrived there earlier and waited for us. When we arrived, everyone get down from the car and walk towards Ck's tomb. Jacy just took out her Iphone and start playing the song " Amazing Grace" . Everyone sang together and suddenly I felt CK 's presence.. He told me that I have to be strong and be there for everyone. I whispered to him telling him that at times I am really really tired . Really needed some rest to re charged. Come to think of it. I better take some rest before I collapse.
I really appreciate the support given by my brother Chee Kwan, Sisters Lye Yong and Lay Mui, sister in law Angie and her son Yong Yee, brother Michael and of course Jacy. Without their support this morning , I guess things would be different. I feel very lucky to have them there and the love that they have given to CK. What more can I ask? No matter what I will try my very best to be there for them in time to come. I really really mean it. That goes the Chinese saying " Lan Heng Lan Tie" - Close bro and sisterhood. What a feeling!. ...
From today's trip I learn something very interesting.
I learned that no matter what we do please bear in mind that we are not alone to face whatever difficulties in life. Please share whatever with others and let them have the opportunity to give us a helping hand to face it together. It will definitely make a difference.
Form today onwards, give yourself a chance - " let others help you" .Thanks again to everyone and the well wishes from Kevin, Nicky Poh , Marvin Yoong and the rest of the family members.