Today, I received my 16tth session of 3DCRT. Time flies, all in all, I have gone through 3 weeks of daily 3DCRT, another 3 more weeks to go before I wrapped up this latest treatment protocol and move on to other treatment issues.
I was supposed to go down to Taiping to attend the old boys reunion dinner and to check on the progress of the rebuilding of the scout den, but unfortunately, I had to cancel the trip on Saturday morning because I was not feeling comfortable due to uncomfortable abdominal pains and discomfort at the chest. I am rather sad of not being able to make the trip because, like a sentimental old fool, I do really look forward to meet those “old boys” to rekindle my childhood memories. On the other hand, the scout den is also part of my sentimental journey from my teenage years to adulthood. I hope, in my absent, the Old Boys association in Taiping and the school's PIBG can ensure the scout den is put up according to schedule and complying to safety requirements. Well, maybe next year, I will be still around to attend the old boys' reunion dinner in Taiping.
Prior to receiving my radiation treatment this morning, the nurse check on my pulse, temperature, blood pressure, and weight. With the exception of my weight, all indicators are in normal range. I am still losing weight, and over the period of four weeks, I lost more than 10 Kg of weight. I am hitting dangerously close to the 60Kg mark, and I hope my appetite can be improved significantly over the next few days to restore upward trend in weight.
Realistically, looking at the current scenario, how do I assess my current situation ? Put it this way, I am now a frailed commander in a badly bruised battleship. Do I now retreat to a safe harbour to find means to recuperate, or do I still charge ahead into the battle ground to defend whatever inches of advantage I still possessed ? Either way, I know, my life now hang precariously on too many unknowns and too many uncertainties which are totally beyond my control. I know, life is tough, but this journey of attempting to restore my health has been too hellish and it really is, a tough journey all this while.
Whatever it is, I do look forward to tomorrow. I know, as long as I can still have an alert mind tomorrow, I will always have a good fighting chance of winning this battle against cancer.
C'est la Vie...........